It's ok to be overwhelmed...

This too is a temporary state

Hi friends,

In the past month, my post-morning what-the-fuck-is-happening-to-this-country news debrief has been followed by a ritualistic cleanse. Nope I am not doing a cold plunge or lighting sage. I spend a few minutes marveling over the Big Bear Lake bald eagle family.

But look at this parenting! This eagle sat here for over twenty-four hours keeping the babies warm!

My kids laugh at my obsession with this avian family. They think I’m wacko for cooing when the mother and father co-parent, or when a parent drops a fish into the nest and they feed their babies—together. Like millions of others, I mourned the loss of one of the babies. But the privilege of watching nature, real animals tending to their young during snowstorms and sunrises, has also delivered a healthy dose of daily awe. And, as a mom of a high school junior, I entertain equal measures thrill and fear that soon these eaglets will be leaving this nest.

My point here, other than sharing my newest obsession, is to remind you of what you already know. Poet Elizabeth Alexander says, “There is more than one thing happening at once. So, as bad as this is, it’s not the only thing.”

Activist Mariame Kaba adds, “Despair is a thief. It saps your energy, depletes your time, and robs you of your ability to dream. And we need dreamers and doers right now.”

In one of my writing class this week, we discussed the Black radical tradition of freedom dreaming. The idea that the structures that bind us are not fixed, despite the distinct feeling like we cannot escape this particular political or societal nightmare. One of them asked, What’s the difference between goal setting and freedom dreaming? I realized that for them, all they know is goal setting. It’s nearly impossible to imagine new structures, because they have never been encouraged to fully dream into the future they want.

My university students have been doing active shooter drills since kindergarten; they have now experienced two (!) Trump presidencies filled with the kind of hate and spite that makes them afraid to speak out; they spent their middle school and early high school years being told touching their friends could possibly kill them. They’ve been told that the climate will be uninhabitable for them to breed, that their brains are rotting because of the screens we’ve given them, and that AI will steal their future jobs.

You have been experiencing this same collective trauma too. I’ve talked to so many of you about not being able to keep up to date with the shit-show called the news, or to muster the energy to resist, or, in some cases, get out of bed. It’s hard to wake up and face a day where you feel like there’s nothing you can do.

That’s when the eagles can be helpful guide. They have to shield their babies from blizzards, hunt for food, and teach the eaglets how to be brave enough to flap their wings and take flight from unimaginable heights.

On my best days, when I can entertain some freedom dreaming about the future, I imagine what new structures we can create from the ashes of what is being systematically torched. When this administration destroys the systems we’ve all been socialized to rely upon, systems that for so many haven’t worked the way they should, what new structures can we dream up to create the society we want? And most importantly, how might we begin to gather now to dream into how to support our communities and build new systems?

If DEI cuts happen at public schools and schools can’t afford aides for students with IEPs, or research is slashed at universities and scientists seek funding from new sources, or if the elderly need to visit the social security office in person, or if the feds aren’t supporting climate adaptation tools, where are tiny places you might offer support—financial or otherwise?

Here’s one tiny thing I am currently doing. I host a monthly gathering people in my community—students, professors, social workers, lawyers, activists, etc—to freedom dream. Black Panthers created the free student lunch program because they were freedom dreaming. They saw a need for their community and understood that working together meant they could meet the moment. We are nowhere near close to that level of innovation, but we are having conversations, and feeling connected, which aren’t too shabby.

As an addition resource, I created The Distraction, a working document for San Diego resources and actions.

I show you this because I want you to understand that we cannot change anything alone. I take heart in knowing there are really smart people fighting. I also feel strongly that there aren’t enough of us imagining what we want to rebuild. I don’t think many of us want to go back to what was, right? So what would happen if we started gathering to freedom dream together? It might not fix anything in the immediate moment, but it could begin to create some compost for the gardens we might one day plant together.

Got ideas? Please share with our community.

I also wanted to share what I’ve read recently. Important newsletters (mostly geared towards politics) are included in The Distraction, the San Diego resource hub. If you are reading/watching/listening to anything fabulous, please share with us as well.

The Quiet Before: What I appreciate the most about this nonfiction book is how it explains the way different types of protests originated. My favorites are the chapters on petitions, zines and the BLM movement.

Too Soon: Betty Shameh’s novel about a Palestinian theater director offers a humanistic perspective of being bicultural in fraught times.

Let This Radicalize You: An energizing nonfiction book by activists about how to organize and regenerate in tough times.

James: Percival Everett’s retelling of Huck Finn from the runaway slave Jim’s perspective is a page turner I didn’t want to end.

Parenting in a Climate Crisis: My writer buddy Bridget Shirvell’s new book is a handy guide to how not to lose hope.

---

Don’t miss the April 5 Hands Off national day of protest.

On a recent trip to Loreto, Mexico, Nikko and I sat on the front of a boat playing with dolphins and this one kept spinning to the side to make eye contact.

At the end of each of my classes, I always tell my students to do something nice for themselves. What shocks me is how few make time to take care of their hearts, bodies and minds. So I would like to send this parting message to you. Block out some time, every day, to do something that feels regenerative. Especially if you are plagued with overwhelm. Rest too is resistance.

~ Michele